The Parable of the Self Harmer from the Book of John in his letter from the Antipodes.
It was, verily, some time back that Iain took up the holy rebel cause against the fascist monolithic Gillette Razor Blade Company.
For a while Schick seemed okay, but it was never a good razor, not good enough. Blood was spilled. And as for Baron Bic, he should have been executed as the true Nazi he was. Experimental surgery.
Iain spent a lot of time combing the 7-11 shelves all over Palestine, and the Olde and New Worlds, as a Testament, and for awhile found comfort in Wilkinson Sword...then it became knownst to him that Wilkinson had soldeth his own sword to Gillette and was thereafter subsumed into that unholy Evil succubus monopoly.
As a symbol of Eternal Resistance, Iain located his grand-father's Cut Throat Razor (whilst the meaning of the name was still somewhat unclear to him) and began a daily ritual of slashing his face to pieces with it and fixing pieces of toilet paper to his whole face, as in a cohesive wrap.
Iain is still out there, somewhere between Melbourne and Jerusalem, bleeding, and yet very clean shaven. You will knowest him when you see-eth him.
There be a lesson within this parable. The first cut is not necessarily the deepest.
For a while Schick seemed okay, but it was never a good razor, not good enough. Blood was spilled. And as for Baron Bic, he should have been executed as the true Nazi he was. Experimental surgery.
Iain spent a lot of time combing the 7-11 shelves all over Palestine, and the Olde and New Worlds, as a Testament, and for awhile found comfort in Wilkinson Sword...then it became knownst to him that Wilkinson had soldeth his own sword to Gillette and was thereafter subsumed into that unholy Evil succubus monopoly.
As a symbol of Eternal Resistance, Iain located his grand-father's Cut Throat Razor (whilst the meaning of the name was still somewhat unclear to him) and began a daily ritual of slashing his face to pieces with it and fixing pieces of toilet paper to his whole face, as in a cohesive wrap.
Iain is still out there, somewhere between Melbourne and Jerusalem, bleeding, and yet very clean shaven. You will knowest him when you see-eth him.
There be a lesson within this parable. The first cut is not necessarily the deepest.
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