Tuesday 4 June 2013

My car, the Volvo C30S SSRI Low Line Sports Coupe, 2009 in Titanium Grey Metal, Ceramic Brakes, Leather inside.

The car was described by His Holiness, the Mahayana Taganatha Buddha, Xi Xinping, as a fine representation of understated Swedish power and elegance. His Holiness actually said "That's a Fucking Nice Car, Mr Wang! That looks like the Fuckin' Diamond Vehicle to me!"

It remains the only sports vehicle fitted with a Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitor in the manifold with a dash switch fly by wire arrangement. 2.4cc, 5 cylinder, super-charged, heavy body, low line, all leather inside with an 8 speaker Bose sound system, a Volvo 'waterfall' dash...Just beautiful.  And indeed it is. Corners like a Great White Shark on amphetamines. Headlights automatically dip with respect in built up areas. A sun-monitor device changes the air-con matrix depending upon the direction of light...the Dash gives me messages regarding emails and the fact that it is overdue for servicing. The glass tailgate is a subtle reminder of the Volvo Simon Templar used to drive as he moved around the world dropping innuendos with one raised eyebrow. the glass tailgate goes back to the Shooting Brake concept of a Hunting Carriage. I often drive around in it with one eyebrow raised, ready for any innuendo-provoking situation.

Leave the doors open for 30 minutes unattended, and it uses little motors to shut the doors, lock up, and send you an annoying email saying 'How could you, you fucking moron?"

I reversed it into a tree awhile back so I don't have pictures of the left rear side. The slight damage is being assimilated and healed by my copious tears and chanting of the Swedish Mahayana Mantra: Om Ah Hum Vajra Guru Volvo Padme Siddi Huuum.".


Glass Tailgate-Shooting Brake Configuration



The SSRI

 

2 comments:

Unknown said...

There are lots of new cars in the market now and I can see that one of those awesome models is in your garage. I can say that this can be a great pick for you and I bet you're enjoying driving this one. This car will work at its best for a long time if you'll maintain it properly. :)

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JOHN Fitzpatrick said...

Dear Ashely, thanks. Its about 6 years old now, I bought it last year, and it's lovely to have a nice car. I am used to having an old ute or 'pick up' truck so the steering and road holding of the Volvo is great... being old by 6 years, it was about the same price as a new small Toyota to buy; yes, I need to maintain it well, for sure. kind regards J